For those of you who stay with friends and family every now and again, here are a few tips to make sure you can be the very best house guest and be invited back time and time again!
#1: Make sure one or more of your children is running a fever. It is not the fever itself that makes you such great house guests, it is the fact that this fever will make your child inconsolably fussy (and LOUD) and keep you up all hours of the night so you are all sure to be pleasant the following day!
#2: Make sure the child that is running a fever and already feeling bad, stuffs himself full of chicken spaghetti and vomits all over carpeted areas right when everyone is about ready to go to bed. It doesn't look or smell nearly as pleasant the second time around!! YUMMM!
#3: This is a great time to try new diapers- especially if your kids have had sensitive tummy issues! Make sure you get one really full of poop and change it in the middle of the carpeted room so that the overflow from the sides and back gets all over the carpet! It is best to do this in the family room, or a room where everyone hangs out and has to smell the lingering NASTY.
#4: Make sure you bring your overly protective and overly nervous (yes.. at the same time) dog to stay too, so whenever someone comes to the door, your dog will bark and pee all over the place..
#5: Make sure you dirty every last towell in the house trying to clean the afore mentioned messes, so that there are none left for anyone to actually take a shower (which you can be assured, everyone will want to do with all the poop, pee, vomit and germs floating around)..
YAY! So as you can see, we had a lovely weekend at my mom's! She said it perfectly after the second poop explotion Nate had all over the carpet in her family room..
"So, when did you say your house was going to be ready?"
Love you Mom!
4 comments:
LOL. I am still laughing! This post was so funny. I am so sorry - hope everyone is feeling better and the carpets can get cleaned! :-)
Funniest post ever. I'm sorry, I hope everyone is back to normal and your mom invites you back!
You are hilarious! At least you can find humor in it now, because I'm sure at the time, no one was laughing! :) I'm sorry Nate was sick, I hope he's feeling better this week. Toddler vomit is as disgusting as an adult's. We've had to deal with that 2 times in Logan's life now, and I hope we don't revisit anytime soon! Love you, hope you have an easier week!
Hehee! Abby loves to practice a few of these rules. We visited a friends house twice so far and both times - she vomited there! Great!
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